Visiting Wendell, going to back into the schools, is so bittersweet for me. It’s emotional overload. When I was in Wendell I was important, every day. I was needed, necessary. Every day I had hundreds of kids show me love. Kids would come running across the playground just to give me a hug. Teachers sought me out for my opinion and counsel. Administrators trusted my judgment on sensitive issues. Parents came to me seeking help for their children.
In the midst of working in an environment of daily affirmation, in a job that gave me purpose, I was uprooted.
God pulled me out of that.
Now, I’m not needed for anything. I’m not necessary.
There aren’t any kids running to give me hugs.
There aren’t any adults seeking my counsel, trusting my judgment.
I’ve become useless and I don’t understand why.
Of course my family loves me, needs me, finds me necessary. But those things are true regardless of where I live. I know that my family will always support me, no matter the circumstances. It’s the other parts of my life that have me baffled.