Now I realize that as I get older, my skill set may increase, but the proficiency with which I do things will decrease. If I were able to play golf (which I still can't because of the RA), I would not be as good now as I was 10 years ago when I was working as a golf professional. If I were still able to play racquetball, I would not be as good because I'm slower. I realize these things and I live with them.
But there's one skill that completely baffles me.
I used to be an excellent sleeper - an Olympic caliber sleeper, a professional sleeper, a world class sleeper. I could sleep any time, any where, for any length of time. If I was waiting for a flight, had 14 minutes before boarding, I could take a 13 minute nap. When I got tired, or sick, I could sleep for 14, 16, 18 hours in a row, non-stop.
Somehow, I've completely lost this ability. Now, my typical sleep time is about 20 minutes, often exactly 20 minutes. Yesterday, after my dad's birthday party, I had reached the end of my energy. So I came home to take a nap. I lay down at 4:37, falling asleep almost instantly. I started coughing - and subsequently woke up - at 4:57. Today, I lay down for another nap, at 2:34. Guess what time I woke up, coughing again? That's right, 2:54, exactly 20 minutes later. This 20 minute thing has happened a lot.
I really want to be able to sleep, to deeply sleep for more than 20 minutes; 20 hours of sleep would be nice. I can't remember the last time I slept through a night and I'd like to change that. I've tried a lot of different sleep aids. Nothing really works.
I'm hoping that if the docs can figure out whats causing all the problems, and get rid of my cough, I'll be able to sleep - someday.